The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

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The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Gloomy Rube (?) » Fri Jul 27, 2018 10:27 pm

I get spam sometimes, and it's often humorous.

For since, today I got one saying they know my password (it was an extremely old one I don't use anymore because it got released years ago in one of those big website hacks, gee, wonder where they found it) and they're saying they -FOUND ME LOOKING AT PORN- and if I don't pay them POINT ONE BITCOIN they will release the info to the public!! Also a video of me will be included!! I have 24 hours!!

Now, I won't let the fact that I don't even have a webcam or have ever even gone to a porn site willingly bother me, because we get to the meat and potatoes at the bottom:
Notice: You now have one day in order to make the payment. (I have a special pixel within this message, and at this moment I know that you've read through this mail).
:sweetielarm: A SPECIAL PIXEL :sweetielarm:
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by West Filly (?) » Fri Jul 27, 2018 10:37 pm

He's looking at you through the pixel peephole.
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by SlateSlabrock (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 1:51 am

This takes me back... It's like I'm in 2003!

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Am I doing this right? :smirk:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Adiwan (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 2:24 am

Gloomy Rube wrote: ↑
Fri Jul 27, 2018 10:27 pm
:sweetielarm: A SPECIAL PIXEL :sweetielarm:
While it seems ridiculous it's a real thing. Well...
In a HTML email you can link to external images. An image (or any other external resource) with a unique URL can identify if the person has read the mail by looking into the web host's log files.
This is why most mail programs disable loading external resources by default.
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Gloomy Rube (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 2:28 am

It was not an html email, it was plaintext :v

and either way that wouldn't be a special pixel, it'd be a special image file :-I
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 2:52 am

twitter still hasn't stopped emailing me business nonsense

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MEASURING ENGAGEMENT

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 2:55 am

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:00 am

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the "fraud information center" link is the only one that actually leads to wellsfargo.com :ponder:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:02 am

i guess you can just put line breaks in the subject field

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by SlateSlabrock (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:02 am

Gloomy Rube wrote: ↑
Sat Jul 28, 2018 2:28 am
It was not an html email, it was plaintext :v
Looking through my Gmail spam folder, the most confusing ones just.... try to get you to e-mail them back, I guess. :pinkieshrug:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:08 am

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important JPEG regarding medicare :twonk: no that artifacting is not from me

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:12 am

they couldn't even decide which company they wanted to impersonate

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:15 am

this was legitimately sent through facebook. i don't have a facebook account :-I

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:23 am

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-.-

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:28 am

NORTH KOREA and TRUMP



Freedom of the press is bedrock of our democracy.
"The press should cover all stories without interference. But, the press needs to use its unique power fairly and balance both sides of any story.”
Mike Harrington Sr.

Every day and night, we view wall to wall coverage on cable television of various stories connected with the President’s personal life; who paid what to whom-- for what-- what are all the legal issues around these events..

We don’t know the ultimate outcome of all these issues or even exactly what happened when, where and why.
All that being said, regardless of how we personally feel about President Trump or how we feel about these particular stories-- there are major events that are getting short shrift.
When Trump started his efforts to call out Northern Korean leader, Kim Yon Un, many talking heads said this was dangerous and the wrong approach. In the end Trump has succeeded in bring Kim Jung Un to the table. This is a problem that has stymied three other Presidents-none of which ever got Korean dictators to the table. Three Americans were released this weekβ€”that should get some credit. We don’t know how the talks will turn out. But, the President should get some credit for getting us to this first step.
No two economists have the same opinion as to the exact effects of the tax cut bill. So what else is new? But you can’t argue against the fact that the unemployment rate has hit 3.9%, the lowest since 1948.
Somebody must be doing something right.
Both Democrats and Republican Senators opposed the original Iran Nuclear deal---that’s why Congress never voted on it.
Some question whether it is the right long term answer to prevent a nuclear Iran. Trump proposes a tougher approach and sanctions that will drastically harm the Iran economy. Trump says that we need not only a true long term agreement for no nukes period and in addition that Iran end its harmful and military interference in the Middle East.

This approach may not work. But, we deserve to hear both sides of this discussion and the President at least deserves credit for suggesting a long term solution.




Paid for by the Republican State Committee of Delaware

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emphasis mine :skeptical:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:31 am

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ah cool, Nigeria must be compensating me for being AMAB

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:34 am

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(-3-)

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Jill (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:36 am

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take a wild guess as to which part of this e-mail made me laugh out loud

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Adiwan (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 3:56 am

I have no picture of said email (would have been in German anyway and it was ages ago) but I got a weird spam email for a berry and grape picking job.
A day after I got a mail for an investment offer in grape and berry wine producers.

It was surreal.
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by West Filly (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 9:33 am

You want to pick berries and grapes? no?

We hired someone else to do that. Want to pay their wages for us?
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Gloomy Rube (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 5:04 pm

In accordance to my religious persuasion, I felt expedient to write and inform you on the wicked conspiracy hatched by the duo of (Mr.kelly frank and Mr.Anthony ) from Ministry Of Finance to divert your funds to their designated account in Cayman Island but unfortunately, they begin to find it difficult to divert the funds due to their inability to provide an adequate identity of the funds, they now moved the funds down to Africa and hide it in a security company in other to buy time to enable them embezzle the funds at their own convenient time, but God stopped them.

From my position as a lowly clerk in this office, Miami Finance Department (444 SW 2nd Ave, Miami, FL 33130, USA), I discovered that the duo criminals moved the fund from United States to China, and then moved it again to Banco Italiano in ITALY. Yesterday, I found out through the Central computer database that they are about to reroute the funds to a security company in Republique Du Benin where they will be able to maneuver the strict IMF money laundering regulatory orders. With this, I felt that it is important for me to alert you on this development. They are still using your name and contract/inheritance identification number as the beneficiary but they have changed the account co-ordinate and this is the reason why they are frustrating you by delaying the transfer of your funds to you, so in order to buy time pending on when they will transfer your funds to their designated account.

I have the reference number of the transaction and also I have the number of the official who is directly in charge at the SECURITY COMPANY. Your payment is supposed to go through the Euro-Asia Credit Control Financial Clearing Department before final Lodgement into the security company. All the data/information about your funds file are within my reach. I do not need gratification from you either in cash or kind. I can never be a part of evil because the bible said YE SHALL KNOW THE TRUTH AND THE TRUTH SHALL SET YOU FREE.

Please respect my discretion in this matter! I will send you the reference number, the name and contact information of the officials of the security company were they kept your funds in Republique Du Benin when I receive your response. I repeat, please do not expose my person, it is not easy to get employment around here and I cannot contend with these powerful individuals because they can eliminate me.

You are advice to reply me immediately at ([email protected]) as I access this e-mail more often.

God bless you,
Mrs. Susan Smith
"wicked conspiracy hatched" is a good turn of phrase :-I
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by SlateSlabrock (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 5:45 pm

Dang, I didn't know Francis Dec was still around and writing.

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Gloomy Rube (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 7:50 pm

you see I can't be a part of evil because THE TRUTH WILL SET YOU FREE
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Orange Fluffy Sheep (?) » Sat Jul 28, 2018 10:33 pm

Hello,
This is an opportunity of a lifetime. I am seeking your consent to present you as a beneficiary to receive $11.5M so that we can both benefit.
Reply for details.


Thank You,
Clifford.
you're welcome clifford
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by SlateSlabrock (?) » Sun Jul 29, 2018 6:46 am

Kate <info> wrote:Image
Why would you bother putting a fake password in your vague scam e-mail? The whole point is to scare people into assuming you know something secret about them, but surely they'll know their own passwords.

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Cthulhu Inc (?) » Sun Jul 29, 2018 8:27 am

Gloomy Rube wrote: ↑
Fri Jul 27, 2018 10:27 pm
I get spam sometimes, and it's often humorous.

For since, today I got one saying they know my password (it was an extremely old one I don't use anymore because it got released years ago in one of those big website hacks, gee, wonder where they found it) and they're saying they -FOUND ME LOOKING AT PORN- and if I don't pay them POINT ONE BITCOIN they will release the info to the public!! Also a video of me will be included!! I have 24 hours!!

Now, I won't let the fact that I don't even have a webcam or have ever even gone to a porn site willingly bother me, because we get to the meat and potatoes at the bottom:



:sweetielarm: A SPECIAL PIXEL :sweetielarm:
I got that one too, with a real password.

I don't masturbate. Their move. :smirk:
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by SlateSlabrock (?) » Tue Aug 14, 2018 4:58 pm

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Who still uses Aol.? :rariwhat:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Mr. Big (?) » Tue Aug 14, 2018 5:27 pm

SlateSlabrock wrote: ↑
Tue Aug 14, 2018 4:58 pm

Who still uses Aol.? :rariwhat:
A lot of cartoonists, believe it or not. I had to reassure someone that their AOL address is still functional when she wanted to contact someone :-I

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Gloomy Rube (?) » Tue Aug 14, 2018 5:40 pm

to say thank you for using the internet daily

aol invented the internet you see
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Orange Fluffy Sheep (?) » Wed Aug 15, 2018 7:13 am

If url blocked copy this link to browser:[yikes]
I am not so desperate for boner pills that I am going to copy/paste shady links.
:snoop: Image :snoop:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Octavia (?) » Wed Aug 15, 2018 10:36 am

I hope this message finds you well
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Octavia (?) » Tue Aug 21, 2018 10:00 am

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You know it's a serious document because it's titled OPEN FILE PLEASE.pdf.
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Mr. Big (?) » Tue Aug 21, 2018 10:28 am

It said "please". That's polite :v:

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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by ToastGhost (?) » Tue Aug 21, 2018 11:16 am

Obtain Your Deets
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Octavia (?) » Tue Aug 21, 2018 11:39 am

I also like how the person it's from doesn't have a name. Their email title is "Wife of General Akin Ozturk". Apparently he's a real person that was indicted for treason, among other things. :v:
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Octavia (?) » Fri Sep 07, 2018 9:22 am

Actual subject line of a spam email I got:

LEGITIMATE PROPOSAL!!!

Seems legit :ponder:
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by West Filly (?) » Fri Sep 07, 2018 1:15 pm

I wouldn't agree to marry anyone over email.
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Princess Flufflebutt (?) » Sat Sep 08, 2018 1:28 am

West Filly wrote: ↑
Fri Sep 07, 2018 1:15 pm
I wouldn't agree to marry anyone over email.
how about over a forum post
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by ToastGhost (?) » Sat Sep 08, 2018 3:06 am

Princess Flufflebutt wrote: ↑
Sat Sep 08, 2018 1:28 am
how about over a forum post
Yes, please. :cutealoo:

(Really I'm just looking for that Icelandic citizenship.) :spoiler:

(Edit: Icelandic citizenship or a romantic relationship. Or both. No pressure. Probably just joking.) :modesty:
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Re: The "Make fun of your spam messages" thread

Post by Orange Fluffy Sheep (?) » Sat Sep 08, 2018 11:14 am

SHIP NOW
Zero Hassle to Get Vlagra, ClaLls, Levitra, and Much More!
Best Pricing in the Market.. FDA-Approved Meds
[ofs note: shady fuckin link]
(Copy and paste the link to your browser)
why is it just boner pills, why not like the brain medicine that makes getting a boner seem like a fulfilling activity
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