Come on in, come to the place where fun never ends. (Shenanigans!)
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Dec 31, 2024 10:39 am

What was Dr. Frankenstein's New Year's resolution?

To make new friends.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 01, 2025 10:57 am

Where did medieval people go to celebrate New Year's Eve?

Knight clubs.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 02, 2025 10:41 am

What do you call a 70's cookie band?

OREO Speedwagon.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 03, 2025 10:40 am

Where do deer go to meet their celebrity crushes?

Starbucks.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 04, 2025 11:42 am

What kind of crazy creature do you get when you mix a yak and a lion?

A maney-yak.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 05, 2025 11:37 am

What do you call friends that you go out to eat with?

Taste buds.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 06, 2025 10:38 am

Why do you duck when the ceiling is low?

So you don’t quack your head.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 07, 2025 10:35 am

A guy walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm.

He asks for one beer, and one for the road.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 08, 2025 10:41 am

I've finally stopped drinking for good. Now I drink for evil.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 09, 2025 10:42 am

Someone broke into my house last night and stole my Limbo stick.

How low can you get?

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 10, 2025 10:35 am

Why don't aliens visit our Solar System?

They read the reviews...just one star.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 11, 2025 12:03 pm

What do you call a cardboard belt?

A waist of paper.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 12, 2025 11:47 am

People say being a waiter is a bad job...but, hey, it puts food on the table.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 13, 2025 10:35 am

The bartender says "No time travelers allowed in this bar."

Two time travelers walk into a bar.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 14, 2025 10:37 am

What do you call competitors of McDonald's?

Arch enemies.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 15, 2025 10:34 am

What did the rainbow say to the pot of gold?

You'll be the end of me.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 16, 2025 10:36 am

What vehicle is the worst kind of gas guzzler?

A hiccup truck.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 17, 2025 10:32 am

I hear dentists are going on strike next week.

Brace yourselves.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 18, 2025 11:21 am

Why is it dark in Skeletor's castle?

Because He-Man has the power.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 19, 2025 11:33 am

Why did the introvert walk around the pond?

Because he didn't want to break the ice.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 20, 2025 10:37 am

I'm gonna open a Pho restaurant that never closes! It's called Twenty Pho Seven.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 21, 2025 10:33 am

What’s the heaviest noodle in the world?

Wonton noodles.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 22, 2025 10:40 am

Why can't you e-mail a photo to a Jedi?

Because attachments are forbidden.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 23, 2025 10:42 am

I like jokes. But jokes about air conditioners? Not a fan.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 24, 2025 10:40 am

How many ants does it take to rent a house?

Ten ants.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Jan 25, 2025 11:20 am

Why couldn’t the sailor play cards?

Because the captain was standing on the deck.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Jan 26, 2025 11:32 am

What does the hero of Asgard have in common with most insects?

A Thor axe.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Jan 27, 2025 10:38 am

What do you get when you eat a gallon of ice cream?

Breyer's remorse.

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Gloomy Rube
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by Gloomy Rube (?) » Mon Jan 27, 2025 12:10 pm
why is there breyer's AND dreyer's in the ice cream biz, it's just confusing
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 28, 2025 2:08 am
I'm not sure.


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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Jan 28, 2025 10:39 am

How do you stop a cute animal?

You just press paws.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Jan 29, 2025 10:19 pm

Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef?

He’ll dessert you.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Thu Jan 30, 2025 10:36 am

What did one piece of toast say to the other?

You're my butter half!

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Fri Jan 31, 2025 10:41 am

What did the soil say to express its feelings for the rock?

I’d settle for you.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sat Feb 01, 2025 11:26 am

What did one chemist say to the other?

I've got my ion you.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Sun Feb 02, 2025 11:41 am

I love cooking with wine...sometimes I even put it in the food I'm preparing.

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Pocket
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by Pocket (?) » Mon Feb 03, 2025 3:59 am
Gloomy Rube wrote: ↑Mon Jan 27, 2025 12:10 pm
why is there breyer's AND dreyer's in the ice cream biz, it's just confusing
That's not even the worst one. You've seen my rant about the two different Buy Me A Coffees, right?
Every jumbled pile of person has a thinking part that wonders what the part that isn't thinking isn't thinking of...
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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Mon Feb 03, 2025 10:36 am

What kind of pants does a ghost wear?

Boo jeans.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Tue Feb 04, 2025 10:40 am

Why did the little clouds idolize the big cloud?

Because he was the raining champion.

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PonyHag714
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by PonyHag714 (?) » Wed Feb 05, 2025 10:39 am

During the summer a local police station developed a mosquito problem...they deployed the swat team.

("And I think it's gonna be a long, long time, Hag.")